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How BALM Works

BALM | March 11, 2019

The BALM is a way of life that empowers families to get their lives back and help their loved ones do so too.

But what makes it different than other family education programs? What makes it special?

The unique component of Be A Loving Mirror.

Be A Loving Mirror is a practice rooted in mindfulness. Participating in the BALM Program and taking the 7 Steps to BALM course will help a family learn how to observe, document, script and have a loving conversation.  Having a coach will help a family accelerate their ability to utilize the process.

Yet, over the years, what we have found is that those family members willing to develop a daily mindfulness practice that takes them deep within through meditation, contemplative prayer, structured breathing exercises and/or other practices, become able to internalize the practices they have learned through the program and with their coach’s help.

I developed the 7 Steps to Be A Loving Mirror when the first group of coaches I was training to work with families shared that they did not know how to duplicate the results I was getting. They shared that the 12 Principles were very informative, but did not contain practical applications to help them help clients have powerful interventional conversations with their loved ones.

I went back into myself to see where I had gone wrong in putting the principles together and realized I hadn’t gone wrong, I just hadn’t finished! I had always helped families document, I’d scripted their conversations for them, and I had been the one to tell them when it was time to have the conversation and when to set a boundary.

This worked one on one, but was not sustainable as it didn’t provide a way for the families to do it when I wasn’t around.

I developed the 7 steps to describe what I was doing in such a way that other coaches could teach it and their clients could then learn and do it themselves.

The first three steps are the inner transformation I came into the coaching relationship with. Once they were written, we could teach coaches (who often already had it) and clients to attain that inner transformation for themselves.

The inner transformation then made/makes it natural to smoothly learn and practice the outer tools of powerful loving communication found in steps 4-7.

BALM is a program that moves a family member from inner transformation to the outer transformation of relationships with others.

Often, a coach and a class will create a start that will allow a family member to have loving conversations, just as I did as a coach before writing the steps. Yet sustaining this loving way of being is an inside job that requires practice and commitment on the part of the person who wishes to see the change in self and family.

When approached in this way, we often see miracles happening in family members and their loved ones.

Be A Loving Mirror is the way we learn to grow in loving relationship and it is the endpoint we achieve as a result of the learning and the practice. It truly is, as we say in Principle 12, The Journey and the Destination.


If you would like to learn more about the 1-year BALM (Be A Loving Mirror) Comprehensive Family Recovery Education Program which includes the 7 Steps to BALM Class CLICK HERE

Or call 1-888-998-BALM (2256) option 3