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Two ways to find your purpose – which one will work for you?

BALM, Life Purpose in Recovery, upcoming life purpose in recovery course | March 5, 2017

This week, Bev’s Corner brings you Part two of the three part series:

How I found my purpose By Beverly Buncher, MA, PCC, CBC, CTPC

In the first part of this series, we talked about how some people yearn to figure out why they are here on this Earth and how they are meant to contribute (to read that one, go here). I shared that I am one of those people. And when I found out it was possible to find out what my purpose was, I jumped on the opportunity.If you would like to know more about my journey and how you might find your purpose, read on…

The first shocking bit of news as i began my studies in the purpose class was that the reason I didn’t have a crystal clear understanding of why I am here and what exactly I am meant to contribute had more to do with the method I had been using to find my purpose than anything else.


I learned that what most people refer to as ‘finding your purpose’, is really an ego based method that is built around exploring what you have always been attracted to and what you have always pursued when given the time and freedom to do so. And, that, while that work is certainly interesting and supplies some clues to point you in the right direction, the results can be vague at best.

For instance, I found over the years that I loved to help people. This came up as a theme over the years and in the class. I also found I loved to teach and that appeared in my life and in the initial stages of the purpose class.

And for years, I used this knowledge to find jobs and careers that allowed me to teach and help others but did not ultimately fulfill my inner yearning to find and manifest my purpose…

In the method of purpose work that I learned and eventually came to teach, we call this Indirect Purpose Work. While it does point to patterns, it falls short of providing the seeker with detailed information about what exactly his or her purpose is and how s/he is meant to apply it to serve in the world.

Through the purpose finding course I took, I found that there was also another method of finding one’s purpose: The Direct Method.

The Direct Method taught me how to move way beyond ego to discover exactly what I was meant to do and who I was meant to serve, with soul based information and direction that has brought peace into my being and given me the details that have opened me up to a life I couldn’t even imagine before doing this work!

Through this approach, developed by my teacher Tim Kelley, I discovered I was destined to help families of addicts find their way, that I was meant to help people in long term recovery find their purpose and that I was given the mission to help not only a few families, but ALL families blaze the trail to recovery in their homes.

I was also given the mission of making life purpose a given on the recovery path and was told that by helping families get recovery first and learn how to help their loved ones, I would be able to help them be a part of the solution in a powerful way that could potentially lead to ending relapse for countless addicts around the world.

If you know about my BALM Institute programs, you know that we work tirelessly toward doing just that day in and day out. Finding my purpose gave me the direction I needed to first create a program for families, then turn it into a comprehensive family recovery education program, then train coaches so I had LOTS of others to do this work with me. The direction I received and continue to receive gave me my purpose and then gave me and continues to give me the details of how to roll it out so I would and will be of optimal use in achieving it.

In the world of purpose, there are four parts to one’s purpose: Essence (who you are at your core), Blessing (what you do day in and day out to impact others), Mission (one or more tasks you are given to complete or contribute to completing in the world) and Message (that which your work is all about teaching to the world).

While I will leave the detail for class, I will say that this journey turned me from someone whose life always had a question mark attached to it, to someone who knows why I am here, what I am supposed to do, how I am supposed to serve others and what impact my work is designed to have on the world.

Since finding my purpose, there have been times when I have questioned how well I am doing what I am supposed to do, but not my purpose itself. Finding my purpose and learning how to manifest it has given me a fulfilling life of contribution and wholeness that I know is making a difference in the world.

And of course, I am in no way a finished product!

I simply have found my way, which, if you knew me before has been a profound change in me, one which has empowered me to, through my own and other’s efforts, help thousands of people whose lives have been affected by their own or a loved one’s struggles with substance use disorder or other struggles.

Today, we have the BALM Institute for Family Recovery Education and Family Recovery LIfe Coach Training which grew out of the earlier work I was doing with individuals and small groups on my Be A Loving Mirror method of Family Recovery.

The Be A Loving Mirror method itself, its 12 principles and 7 steps, the 7 C’s, hundreds of blogs, ebooks, articles and other writings, all grew out of my purpose work. And now we have coaches on two continents who we have trained and who are still in training, with future coaches enrolling weekly to begin their studies over the next year. Families are signing up weekly to join the BALM Comprehensive and coach with our coaches and now our coaches are training to deliver the 12 Principles in person in their own communities after 4 years of offering the program solely online. I do not believe this would have happened had I not found my purpose and asked questions like:

  • How can I get this out to families the world over?
  • What if people don’t just want an online program?

And then getting answers on the soul level as well as through the insights and assistance of others to make it happen. Over the years, the right people and places have come into my life to help us manifest a program that is significantly transforming the lives of the families and coaches who choose to utilize it and my personal mission has become the mission of my company Family Recovery Resources, LLC and its school, The BALM Institute.

Now that I am seeing this becoming a program that others are enthusiastically embracing and extending through their own efforts, I am noticing requests from many of the coaches I train to find their purpose and from family members as well. With only so many hours a day, I am feeling called, again through my ongoing purpose work, to work with people in recovery in groups, to find their purpose as I have. Often, recovery is the foundation of  a meaningful life and finding one’s Life Purpose in Recovery can create a whole new level of meaning and peace for the family member or loved one!

I have been doing this one-on-one for years with clients and have watched people in family recovery and long term recovery blossom and find peace as they too have found their life purpose through this work.  I call my program, which is based on Tim’s True Purpose program,  Life Purpose in Recovery.

The first Life Purpose in Recovery Class will begin this July, will be open to only four applicants,to allow for plenty of individual attention, and will take place weekly for 12 weeks. To learn more about whether this course could be for you, feel free to text me at 786 859 4050 with your name and “Could we talk about finding my purpose?” We will set a time to discuss the possibilities!

To learn more, you can also check this newsletter and our website blog page to read part three of the three part series Want to Find Your Purpose?

Looking forward to beginning this journey with you!



Be A Loving Mirror!

Beverly A. Buncher, MA, PCC, CBC, CTPC

Family Recovery Coach/CEO

Family Recovery Resources, LLC



786 859 4050